I’ve heard this a few times from different sources. I didn’t get what they meant. How could something so simple, something everyone does, something that is necessary in life, be our superpower? In the book I just read (Burnout by Emily Nagoski and Amelia Nagoski) they discuss sleep. Did you know that getting 5-6 hours of sleep a night routinely causes you to function at the same level of someone who is legally intoxicated? And that just ONE night of 4 hours or less puts you in that same category? I’ve read this other places as well. It’s scary because I feel like some people take pride in “being fine on little sleep” and I know lots of people get those number routinely. I think many have become so used to this level of functioning that they feel it is normal.
Maybe it’s because I prioritize sleep… a few years back I realized how important it was for me to get my full 8 hours of sleep. I can mostly handle one night with less sleep, but anything more and I get sick and I am not a pleasant individual to be around. I can’t treat people kindly, I have no patience, my brain feels like a foggy place… I used to drink coffee, which did help to some degree, but I just did not feel good. Once I started getting better sleep the difference was night and day (haha, ya see what I did there 🙂 🙂 :)). It wasn’t always easy, but here’s a few of the things I find that help me with getting my full sleep!
First, I have a night time alarm. I don’t use it anymore, but until it became habit, I had an alarm that went off at 9pm (based off me getting up at 6am). At 9pm when that alarm went off, if I was not already in bed or in the process of getting to bed, I started — you know, brush your teeth, wash your face, close up the house, let the dog out… This gave me some time to read in bed (I do not read on an electronic screen anyway, but it’s discouraged in bed due to the activation from the light) and toss and turn some before falling asleep – ideally by 10pm. This alarm was the first habit I started.
Leading up to this time, I try to wrap up most of my “brain work” by 7pm… This is anything that requires me to think – it could be writing a blog post, it could be listening to a podcast, even doing chores or my workout. By 7pm I try to have most of the things done I need done for the day. Anything after that time I try to keep to relaxing things that have low risk of causing me any level of anxiety. This will vary person to person, but for me, I try to look at my schedule for the next day one time in the evening and then not again — or I will think about it all night. I might write some cards during this time, do a puzzle, play a board game, read, I also will watch shows during this time. This last one is one that many would discourage, but I haven’t found that it seems to affect my ability to fall asleep. Screen use within 1-2 hours of time you intend to fall asleep can cause your brain to activate and therefore your body’s natural circadian rhythm gets thrown off. I also often have calming tea during this time – I like chamomile and peppermint best. I make sure to drink this by 7:30-8pm though so that I don’t have any liquids too close to bed!
I have also tried to create a nice space in the bedroom for sleep. This involves a few aspects: good mattress and pillows, good sheets, right temperature, little/no light, little/no sounds (or white noise), no funky smells or drafts… Good mattress and pillows are something I still need to work on – what we currently have doesn’t seem to have a negative impact, but next go around I plan to do a bit more research (did you know they say you should replace your mattress every 7-10 years?) We do have excellent sheets (I love the Pima percale ones from LL Bean.) We keep the house around 68º — cooler is better, even if you have to have an extra blanket. You want to eliminate as much light as you can in the bedroom – black out curtains help, you can use black electrical tape to cover any indicator lights on electronics (good trick for hotel rooms also!) We have a diffuser that rights at night with essential oils (I love lavender!), so the subtle noise and pleasant smell help to create a nice sleeping environment.
I do have nights where somethings weighing on my mind heavy and those nights are still tough. I keep some paper and a pen by my bed to jot down things if I think of them. I have found that it helps to get it out of my brain. If I really can’t fall asleep or wake up and can’t get back to sleep, I will get up and read in the living room or elsewhere. I try this for 20 or 30 minutes and then try to return to sleep. Chris and I will also make it a point to have any heavier talks earlier in the evening — this way if they illicit a stronger emotional response we have some time to wind down before sleep.
A few things that I would like to incorporate more of are yoga before bed, some time of meditation/gratitude moment, and less screen time.
Do you prioritize sleep? Do you have trouble sleeping? I’d love to hear your thoughts on this. I feel like this is especially important for women and in a society that doesn’t always value sleep, we really need to fight for it at times!
Sweet dreams!
xoxo, Gretchen